The Future

So I finally broke the news to my dance teacher. She told me she should have been the second person to know after my husband and that she feels bad for telling me off in earlier weeks for not doing a movement properly. That was very sweet. She was very surprised that I am already 3 months though. I guess I don’t show it yet though I already gained 3 kg.

Me being my usual worrying self, I am already depressing over my life, more specifically, my career after the baby comes. I am absolutely terrified. It is not the baby who will change my career. The problem is that I haven’t been able to establish a career, which speaks to my heart so far anyway. And it will get only harder as I get older and am with no child care.

To top it all, the natural disasters in Japan, the radiation leak, problems in the Middle East, problems in my own country, everything upsets me so much. I cry almost every night. I worry about bringing a child into this troubled world.